How Stepping Away Clarifies Purpose and Unlocks Your Unique Design
Most leaders assume the best way to lead is to stay glued to the helm—more meetings, more messages, more motion. But the longer I lead, the more convinced I am that clarity rarely shows up in the noise. It arrives when we create space for it.
Every quarter, our founder steps away for what we call a Think Day. It’s not a vacation day or a chance to catch up on admin. It’s built for a single purpose: to listen, reflect, and decide. Alan leaves the inbox behind, finds a quiet coffee shop (or a trail), and wrestle with big questions before they wrestle with him. And while stepping away may feel counterintuitive, it’s one of the most practical ways we know to serve our team and our mission.
Why a Think Day Works (and Why It Feels So Hard)
If you lead anything, your family, a team, a business, our calendar naturally fills with urgent things. A Think Day protects the important things: vision, priorities, and the next right steps. Without margin, we drift from our purpose and default to busyness. With margin, we return to the work that matters most.
When we take a Think Day, we’re not chasing certainty. Certainty is an illusion. we’re fighting for clarity. Enough light to see the next few steps. We’re asking questions like:
What season are we entering, really—not ideally?
Given our constraints and opportunities, what will this season require of us?
What must I stop doing so I can lead from my strengths?
The outcome isn’t a 40-page plan. It’s a handful of high-leverage decisions and clear, simple direction we can communicate to our team.
The Four H’s to Look For
Clarity always turns practical. For coaching relationships, We’ve learned to look for four traits that predict momentum:
Humble — I have something to learn.
Honest — Here’s what isn’t working.
High Capacity — Influence that cascades into others.
Hungry — Willing to act, not just talk.
Those four H’s signal someone is ready to do the work of growth. And they map directly onto what we call unique design—the powerful intersection of wiring, gifts, and purpose that only you carry.
Unique Design: Where Purpose Meets Wiring
Your unique design is where the work you were made for meets the way you’re naturally wired. It’s not fantasy or ego; it’s honest alignment:
Wiring: how you think, decide, and create.
Gifts & skills: what you do unusually well.
Purpose: why it matters and who it serves.
When leaders operate from unique design, energy rises, impact multiplies, and the culture benefits. When we drift from it, everything gets heavier—our home life, our team, our results.
A Think Day helps you return to unique design. It’s where you name what fills you, what drains you, and what must change so you can lead from your best.
Delegation vs. Dumping (And Why It Fuels the Team)
One tough outcome from any good Think Day is the list of things you must stop doing. That’s not weakness; it’s stewardship. The difference between delegation and dumping is ownership and care:
Dumping: “I’m done with this—someone else take it.”
Delegation: “This work doesn’t fit my lane. Who’s the right person—and what do we remove from their plate so they can own it?”
Leaders who delegate thoughtfully unleash other people’s unique design. The organization gets healthier. Trust rises. Execution improves. And as a bonus, you’ll stop pretending you’re energized by tasks that secretly drain you.
Communicate Clarity—Especially When Things Change
Here’s the part many leaders miss: Think Days only help if your clarity becomes shared clarity. When change is high, silence is costly. People fill the gaps with fear. If all you can say is, “Here’s what we know, here’s what we don’t, here’s what’s next,” say it. Context + clarity + compassion builds trust, even when all the answers aren’t available yet.
When we return from a Think Day, we don’t drop edicts. we share a version one, ask for input, and co-create the plan with the people who will live it. That shift—from pronouncing to partnering—keeps the team aligned and energized.
New Levels, New Decisions
Success is wonderful—and disorienting. You break through a ceiling and suddenly feel like a beginner again. Many leaders stay small to avoid that discomfort. Don’t. Just recognize that what got you here may not get you there. As you rise, you’ll need to eliminate some good things to pursue the best things. That’s not failure; it’s focus.
A practical challenge I’m leaning into: each quarter, delegate one meaningful task to the right person. Over time, those decisions free you to spend the bulk of your week in your unique design.
How to Run Your Own Think Day
You don’t need a retreat center or a flight across the country. Start where you are:
Block the time. Half day if a full day feels impossible. Airplane mode is mandatory.
Name the season. Given reality (not fantasy), what is this season and what will it require?
Audit your work. List your fills (energy-giving) and drains (energy-sapping).
Clarify the few. Choose 3–5 decisions or priorities that will move the needle.
Decide what to stop. Eliminate or delegate one meaningful task.
Communicate. Share version one with your team. Invite feedback. Co-create next steps.
Questions to Take With You
If you want to use this post to fuel your first (or next) Think Day, take these along:
What’s the deeper purpose driving my life and leadership right now?
Where have I lost sight of that purpose?
What work sits squarely in my unique design—and what doesn’t?
What must I stop doing (or delegate) this quarter?
Who needs clarity from me this week—and what will I say?
Healthy, high-impact leadership doesn’t happen by accident. It’s built by leaders who pause, listen, and choose with intention. Block a half day. Ask better questions. Decide what matters now. Then communicate the path and invite your team into it.
If you want help clarifying your season and returning to your unique design, let’s talk. Book a Breakthrough Session and we’ll map your next right step together.